When You Feel Worthy, You Can Heal Your Life - Marie Perez

ST Intro/Outro: 00:00:10

Welcome to Soul Talk. The podcast founded and created by Monica Ramirez, the warrior of love. Soul talk was created in 2020 when a pandemic hit, and we were in lockdown. She wanted to have exciting conversations with open minded people, so they could understand different aspects of herself, and she could help others in the same way. She interviews, healers, coaches, therapists, psychics, readers, channelers, mediums, intellectuals, poets, artists, and more. She calls it Soul Talk, because it started as a conversation from soul to soul.

Monica Ramirez: 00:00:48

Hello, everyone. This is Monica Ramirez, Warrior of Love. And thank you for coming back to soul talk. Today we have a very interesting combination of her name is Marie Perez. Marie Perez is a certified health and life coach who is a lifestyle coach who is passionate about helping women receive and restore the areas in their life that are broken or lost. No, Nona Energizer Marie inspires others to live that will intentional joy. She's also a natural cutting edge products that can help you others healthy and stronger in their lives. The Anti Aging helping by showing them how to boost their immune systems got health, hormone issues, and inflammation and health. Heart Health. This is very dressed in any so needed in reality, because it is where everybody's having problems. A lot of them it starts from the gods, that I have a different theories about the God issues, I used to be sick with lupus, or a fibromyalgia and I heal myself. So and without I don't take any kind of medication. So but but yes, it is very interesting what you're doing. But it's been neat how you're managing that, and the lifestyle coach and, and also Health Coach, how you're managing both.

Marie Perez: 00:02:24

Okay, so I'll kind of go back a little bit, because several years ago, I was before I became a health coach, I had some health issues, and we had our grandkids that were living with us. And one of them had some issues as well. And since they were going to be living with us, my son was in the military and the kids were going to be living with us. And there were three of them. And I knew that I had to figure out how to help him if we were all going to manage for six months to a year. And so that literally got me on the path of learning and researching about health, about the condition that he had, I had no idea what it was. And so I went to the library, and I asked, you know, did they have any books and one of the books that she had recommended, and I always love to share this because sometimes when we're we don't know how to figure things out, there are so many different resources. So it was a book called What's eating your child. So I got that book. And I started reading that realizing that some of it was situational. Some of it was food, some of it was just a lot of different things going on in his life. As a child, we shifted some things in his life, we shifted our diet, the way we all ate, and it made me realize that I had a gluten intolerant as well, because I had some emotional ups and downs. And by changing how we ate, I saw a shift in my health. And so that really is where all started was reading books, researching, changing how I ate. And then five years ago, I ended up going to school online for health and life coach to actually learn more. Because sometimes when you tell somebody, you know, well, maybe if you change this, maybe if you change that though, they kind of question well, how do you know? So I felt like I needed that certification of, you know, I did some training, I do have the knowledge. I'm not perfect. I make mistakes. I don't have all the answers, but I know that I can help you in the area of what I know. And during that time while I was going to school because of my gluten intolerant. I also started a small cooking business so I learned how to make healthy eats and treats that were gluten free. And so I always tell people, there probably almost isn't any dessert that I can't figure out how To make gluten free, or turn it a little bit to make it healthier, and better for you. So that's kind of where it all started for me was back then researching for my grandson realizing, okay, I've got something going on in my life. Let me learn and educate. So I had a cooking business and a coaching business. And because I had some other things prior to that, in my personal life, I just kind of started helping other women, seeing where they were at in their life what they needed to change, because there's always a why we all know that there's always a why you want to change something. And there's another why behind that, why behind that, why. And so working on that, helping other other women mostly realize that number one, you know, sometimes it's just a small change, that's like my mantra, change a habit, change your life. Because you can make a 1% shift in something you're eating or a way that you're thinking or a relationship that you're in. And that literally can shift your life in so many ways. So that's kind of where all got started for me. And then I ended up having an issue with my back, which caused me to pivot even more so to work with the technology that I work with. So in my coaching, I do more mentoring, and then I kind of share about this technology. And I still do a little bit of cooking, because I had such a clientele of people that loved the different things that I made that when they see me post pictures, they'll say, Do you have any for sale? So that's a little bit right there.

Monica Ramirez: 00:06:50

Yes, we were had the way shorts for our clients, for the people that are there. No was for a long time. And they can see the shift in us. It's not that I remember when I was healing myself, I did it in different ways. Yes, I changed my way of eating, I became brisket, dairy, and of course, Ms. Dairy Memphis get dairy. And that helped me to remove that sickness that he was going to kill me lupus. And but at the same time, it was a lot of inner work. That is the one I actually heal me the food help not to get me swallowed. But the emotional part, it was the one that was created to start to sickness. And so do you work in that level with your clients in the motional, because that's where it creates a lot of the fears of syndicate?

Marie Perez: 00:07:49

Well, I think sometimes when I've done the initial assessment with them, and they bring something up in their personal life, emotionally, we try to go back in that area, because that's what it was, for me part of mine exactly the same thing was emotional, of somehow a way that I was raised as a child. And then I carried that with me of not feeling good enough or looking for something that I didn't get as a child from my father that I ended up with still looking for in relationships with men that it was dysfunctional, it was wrong. So a lot of times we kind of go to that place, and I let them share with me. And I just kind of tried to help them, you know, see that a lot of it is to do with our emotions, our thoughts. And sometimes those thoughts are someone else's programming. And it's interesting that you just said that because recently I just took a trauma class with my husband training to help in that aspect of sometimes we don't realize that it can be a trauma that happened to us when we were very young. And traumas are so many different ways. It could be you know, something that scared you it could be something that happened to someone in an accident, something that was spoken over you, you know that you carry and those traumas just become greater as you go. And sometimes we have to go back sometimes we just have to move forward and let go of whatever that block is. And a lot of times it ties into unforgiveness.

Monica Ramirez: 00:09:38

Yes, that that is so true. And it's not only about the forgiveness to the person that harmed us in any aspect. It is about us forgiving ourselves for making that choice. And we always forget about that very important part. That is like because it is program in the society. For religion that you have to forgive, everybody puts out a chicken or a chicken, whatever it is, but you're not putting your inner cheeks, where you have to forgive yourself for making the choice, or mink maker, whatever it is that nothing because you're carrying guilt and shame. And that can get you sick. You can change. But you don't do the inner work is not gonna work. Correct?

Marie Perez: 00:10:27

Yes. And you know, that's interesting, again, that you said that, because that was part of the training, that I think sometimes we don't realize is that because of not letting go not forgiving ourselves, which is the most important or not forgiving that person, whether or not they want it, we see them or not, but that affects us in our body, it settles in some times, in our emotions in our health, you know, it can bring on different diseases. Because of the forget, it's kind of like it's like the route that starts it and it just feeds and then causes something in our bodies to break down.

Monica Ramirez: 00:11:15

Yes, I one of my favorite books that helped me a lot. It was from Lewis Hayes, you can heal your life. I don't know. I always recommend that book. Because actually, that's the one that is like, because you can see in there that the majority of the sickness has psychosomatic, we created every single sickness, in our, in our body, through our emotions, to whatever your the way you were saying. It was from the traumas from our childhoods, many times or it can be also in adulthood, too. But they're creating a Europe to the time in there when we're a kid. And we were not. We, for money reasons, many times our parents is not by us that toy or that candy, that created a trauma or a kid, because we're not good enough, we don't behave good enough, or we don't deserve it, or whatever it is, that relates in our adulthood, at the same time that you were saying it. And going back to something that you were saying about the choosing of different men, how we can continue because we had traumas women, with our favorite father, our father figure we're getting as the man that we're going to be searching for, because we tend to look for a man that actually adds entry does exactly that. Our dad? Correct.

Marie Perez: 00:12:49

Yeah. And you know, sometimes it's when we don't get that attention. And being a girl, you know, you look for that. Or you you think that when you're a child, that's what you need that nurturing from your father, the love the acceptance, and when you don't get it, or they say the exact opposite. You're right, that's exactly what you do. And sometimes we and I'll say we, as me, we look for in a man, somebody that it's almost like, maybe we can help fix them, maybe I can do something to make it better. You can't fix anybody. You know, I was the one that was broken, looking to fix someone else. And all I was doing was just repeating the pattern, the history of what I wasn't getting, I wasn't gonna get from them either. So by me trying to fix it, I think we as women, because that's part of who we are as being nurturers as being, you know, mothers as being women to help other people. When we don't get that as a child, then that's the direction I think we tend to go in relationships of, okay, I didn't get it. So now I'm going to look for it, and it's in that wrong person, and then we're trying to fix it. You can't, we can't fix it, there were the ones that are broken. So we have to go back and figure out what it is that we need to shift and change in our mind, in our hearts in our lives. To be able to go on and sometimes it was something that was spoken over us, you know, we don't realize that if someone speaks something over you, you can carry that, you know, like you said, we're not good enough, you know, or happening and not like so and so or why didn't this work out? You know, that's just not enough. Then we always think in life. Well, I'm just not enough. So I don't deserve or to have somebody better I don't deserve someone that's going to care for me. I've got to keep searching to fix what wasn't right.

Monica Ramirez: 00:15:10

Yeah. And so because there's this old programs that we have, and we share noon and evening music, I, nowadays I'm more aware, and then teach my students to be more aware of whatever they're releasing, you know, those tragic songs like this because you don't make me happy. Or I could not make you happy. And the people who have been this song and get programming more themselves, and they will listen, this is their kids. This tragic songs, that is house a mike have a very good reason. In reality, this programming us making us believe that we can make someone happy, or someone has to make us happy. And that's why in reality in this moment, and I will plan it was there more divorces, because people are finally making aware of those little things that no one can make you happy we can change anyone that people change because they chose to.

Monica Ramirez: 00:16:13

And that takes me to a one of the things that I wanted to talk with you about coming back from the divorce. Because like I mentioned, there's a lot of divorces more now than before. That women are were finally asking for the divorce in the past this society was marked that we could not divorce Oreos will work whatever we mark and our kids and our society. But time have changed. Women, we're not living in the same stage in mind. We're not giving up how, how do you update it? Because I yeah, I'm divorced. I've been divorced four times. And I imagine that you you're divorced, too. We talk a little bit this about off camera. And how it works. What do you mean, coming back from the divorce?

Marie Perez: 00:17:07

Well, I think a little bit like what we were talking about, as we're programmed, as, you know, when we've made those mistakes, it's a failure. And so for me, I was looking, I kept searching and looking, who can I fix? How can I get better? And so I kept making the wrong mistakes in men, I made the wrong choices. And then so by making the wrong choices, I was with another man and I'm in no way, you know, trying to badmouth him, but the truth is the truth. Like, things weren't going well, there was something you know, that just wasn't right in our life in our marriage. And I was to the point that, you know, I didn't want to have to go through a divorce again. So I was getting to the point of giving up, like, you know, that mindset of, okay, you failed, you know, nobody's gonna want you you failed, you can't come back from this, you might as well just give up and, you know, my kids were grown. And, you know, and that's where in your head, those, you know, thoughts just keep playing over and over and over. And I was literally ready to give up because I didn't want to go through a divorce again. I did not want to have that happen, and be a failure that I thought, you know, so for me, it was just really rare thing, you know, of how, you know, what do I do? Like, kids are gone, there'll be okay. And someone had given me some music to listen to. And it's funny how you say music. This one was honestly a releasing song for me, to where, you know, I hope you dance not to give up on life. You know, and so when I heard it, I knew it was like, Oh, my gosh, no, no, it's okay. I got to keep going. You know, to the point that I knew I needed to walk away because if I didn't walk away, I was ready to just kind of give up on life. And there's so much more in life. So by saying, Okay, wait a minute, this is my release. So many things opened up to what was like, Oh my gosh, there were things that I didn't know about, I guess maybe I just wasn't ready to know about them or here, but I had to just let go. And then say, Okay, wait, it's worth me living. It's worth I deserve to be happy. I deserve to have a happy life and love myself because see, that was part of it. I didn't love me. You know, and when we don't love ourselves, it's we're looking for to change other people. We're looking for the comfort in other ways when we feel so broken, that I still had So much more work to do on myself, to say exactly what we talked about the beginning, I forgive myself for all these things that I've done, and I deserve to be happy. And it was like everything shifted when that happened.

Monica Ramirez: 00:20:17

I totally agree with you, it is, in reality, in my experience, Exergen talk about the students, it is the thing that actually shifts me and make me changing the way I eat, changing the way I think, changing the way I talk to myself. He was trying to love myself. And that's what he actually healed me. You can take all the pills that the doctors will tell you that he used to not loving yourself. No medicine, and there's no magic wand that is going to make you love yourself, or yourself. And this is something that majority did persons did not understand. Because they don't know we're not dedicated to love ourselves. Like we're educated not to be giving ourselves were educated to be careful with your ego. So do not trust yourself to not believe us or etc, etc. And your own less go to with a priest and the one is going to talk to God because you can talk directly to God, because you're this little human. And those things actually affect us in a way how we observe ourselves. And what do we think with this serve? And what if we believe in ourselves? How do you work with your clients about in believing themselves again, and loving themselves without and learning to control the ego, that's another part, yes, control the ego but not disappearing, becoming friends with your ego, so that they can actually heal completely themselves.

Marie Perez: 00:21:56

I think some of it is just kind of helping them, like we talked about number one, forgiving yourself, I have an exercise, and this was one that was really hard for me when I was going to school. So when I've shared it with other women, just as talking about it sometimes will stir something within them is being able to go in a room, you know, we're a mirror is look at yourself in the mirror, and tell yourself that, you know, and I couldn't do that, at first, I could not do that I would look at myself, and you know, and just really look at myself. And I was like, Okay, I don't know if I love you. You know, so I had to tell myself and then believe, like, I love you you deserve. Like I said, we talked about you deserve to be happy. You know? What is it that that's you, you know, because when you can't say that, as you look at yourself, you know that reflection, there's a stirring within you, there's a stirring within your heart, your soul or your mind to where something comes up. So then that's kind of where we go, like, what is it and usually it's an it's an emotion of, well, someone said this to me, or this happened to me or I did this and I just didn't feel good enough. I just didn't feel like I deserved it. And I think when you start doing that exercise, and you can we talk about it, it kind of comes up, you know, it releases a lot of what stuck and blocked you know, in your, in your brain, in your heart. And then to go back again and try the exercise again, it gets easier, you can look and say, you know, you may not be able to stand there the two minutes because what we ask people to do is two minutes, look in the mirror and just say I love you. I love you, you know looking at yourself looking at that reflection. And it changes because then you start to feel it because you've let go of, well, this is what I was taught, you know, this is what keeps coming up in my brain. And it's not overnight. It's a process. It's an ongoing process. Because we know that in life, there are triggers. So you know, you can say oh, I've got this and good. But then something happens. And then you kind of regress but that's just life we aren't guaranteed that everything's gonna be roses. You know what I mean? We know that things are gonna happen. Someone's gonna say something to you, or a family member, you can get into a discussion or an argument with them. That can bring up something it's just okay let me let go of it. That's not true. That's not a true statement anymore. And then moving forward, and that's made a big difference.

Monica Ramirez: 00:24:56

That is so true. Because people But tends to see us how we were in the past. And for them, it's very difficult to see us, we already did our shift. So the people, when you meet someone from your past, that tend to do see you in your present, from the person that you were before, when you were in seek when you were in your drama when you were married, or divorced, or doesn't do your things. But we get stuck also the same time in that mentality, like the rest of the people. That's why family is very triggering, because we tend to act with them like before, because that's the pattern that we've been doing with them, or whatever caused and so whoever it is, and that's why we, let's say we're very fixed our got. We're very, you know, having any issues with our stomach, but we see our family again, it goes back. Why, because of these issues, we go back to the same mentality. And it's a never ending story where we have to continue being coming aware. So we are not reacting the same way. Because our as we're gonna get sick again.

Marie Perez: 00:26:11

Hmm. Well, it's that self talk, I think it's off changing the self talk that we tell ourselves, because regardless of what someone says, you can stop it, you can block it, you know, as a child, you don't know that. So you take it in. So as you get older and you learn, then that's where you realize, and even, you know, a trauma of, you know, going through a divorce or losing someone, you know, it brings on all of these emotions. They're okay, emotions are normal. We know we're supposed to have them. We know we're supposed to go through things. But then it's, do you stay there? Or do you say, Okay, nope, I'm not going to believe that lie anymore. Or, Yes, I lost this person. But let me remember them for the good times that we have. Because when we stay there, it's almost like we're just going deeper, deeper, deeper into quicksand. Again, you know, and in situations with family, for instance, if it's toxic, we know that has to be limited, that has to be a limited time that we spend with them. Same thing with people that we hung around with our sphere of influence has to change for us to stay the course. Because if we don't you what is that saying you are who the five people that you hang around with. So if you keep going back, even though you're changing, and you're shifting, and you're feeling really good about yourself, then you go back to where everybody's complaining, everybody's Oh, this and that, and oh my god, she did this to me. And she did that to me, and I feel that it just pulls it all back in. Instead of Nope, you know what, I love them. But I gotta keep my distance, because I want it to be different for my life. You know, we said we can't change anybody else, we can only change who we are, we can only reboot how I say it's like we're we're booting our own computer, which is our brain.

Monica Ramirez: 00:28:20

And at the same time, we want a different life story or a different experience in life, we can change it from outside, we have to start with from within. And then there is a possibility that whatever is outside is gonna shift or is gonna change or is going to leave. Because you're not taking the hooks anymore. And that is very important. So like that you're gonna continue getting so trigger or reacting to the triggers that you were mentioning early.

Marie Perez: 00:28:55

And that's why I think sometimes people need that accountability partner of having a coach or having a mentor. Because when you start to feel those things coming on, you call them you text them, you know, you do what you need to do to pull you back out, where they can say, hey, what's going on? Let's talk about this. Let's walk through it. And now let it go. Close that door. You know, sometimes it's closing those doors on things that are pulling us in, and then going back to the place where we want to go and changing our life life. Like where do you want to go from here? What do you want the rest of your life to be like? Who do you want to be? What dreams do you have? What goals do you have and then working towards them? And when you get stuck because we know we all fall down? Then you get back up? Get a hold of that person and say okay, I've had a really rough one helped me you know, always getting how I look at it and Another, someone you trust, their opinion, or their help, they can't tell you what to do. But by hearing someone else's thoughts that can help you say, oh, yeah, that's right. This is how I want to think this is what I said I wanted to do, I said, I wanted to do it. And then you refocus, you kind of like get back up, dust yourself off and keep going in the right direction, instead of falling back down and say, Well, I'm just gonna stay here, it's never gonna work, well, it will work, you just have to keep going.

Monica Ramirez: 00:30:35

That is true. That is true. Because that's, that's the blockage that we have, that we as human beings, are not aware that we even have it. And that's why it's important to get coaches, because we all have blind spots. It doesn't matter it is the Chopra, or the Lai Lama will have the blind spots, I always have say that if we were already fixed, all the coaches, or all the healers, or all the gurus, or all these people are gonna be experiencing this, like with all these traumas that we are causing every day. And but day, we still, here's because there's still things that we're working with ourselves. So that's why it is important for everybody to have any kind of support. And there is no such thing that someone I have heard this from many of my clients telling me, Well, some people that were not my clients, saying, I don't have any traumas, I don't have any issues. We bet to have heard that too, because many people still say that because there's still a taboo, for any health, or, or any kind of coaching or therapies or whatever, to work with those traumas and work with those limitations that we all have. As human beings, we all have them. Yes, working with the latest Correct?

Marie Perez: 00:32:02

Yeah, it's important it is I think, is they push it down, because I pushed it down. You know, when I was younger, I pushed it down. But I knew that I wanted to change that trajectory for my children. So when I was old enough, I went for counseling, you know, and I always, there's nothing wrong. If you need counseling, if you need help, if you need a coach, if you need to go see a mentor or pastor. If they can help you change something, then go because when you say I don't have anything wrong, I don't need any help. That's your ego saying, Okay, we don't want to deal with this. So let's just leave it where it is. But then you affect everything and everybody around you. And I think how I look at it is you're blocking yourself from being the best version of you that you were meant to be. You know, and that's so important, more meant to be more. We're meant to help people. We're meant to enjoy life. We're meant to share even that heartache in our life of the trauma, that once we get the healing or once we get to the place that we can deal with it to now turn around and grab that hand of someone else because you know that you know what they're going through. You can say, I got it, I understand. Let me help you. This is what worked for me. Because we're not alone. We are never alone, unless you choose to be alone. And that's what keeps us stuck in life and that capitalism.

ST Intro/Outro: 00:33:47

Welcome, then choosing to be part of this group you have said yes to yourself. You've chosen to confront those limitations keeping you from achieving the life of your dreams. Monica Ramirez, Warrior of Love is a transformational belief coach. She's a psychic Channeler certified NLP life coach BQ H that is hypnotherapy, Akashic Records reader, public speaker, writer and artist. She works with many modalities and has created her own like this one to help you get over the limitations and achieve the transformation you desire. So you can anchor your emotions that you desire. Probably going to be hosting a new session every Tuesday at 7pm Central time leading the group through a guided meditation then proceeding to work with people individually. So join Monica here in this free journey by joining the zoom link.

Monica Ramirez: 00:34:36

part of the certification of health and lifestyle coach. What it is entitled do is about reprogramming neuro linguistic programming or detecting you know how it is.

Marie Perez: 00:34:48

Well why did I think is getting to the root of what's going on? Whether it be if someone has an issue with health sometimes we try to go there and see because that again for me Mine was emotional, I was an emotional eater, because that was something I could control. And you couldn't tell me I couldn't do it. So I would eat, just to eat, because it would suppress the pain of what I needed to deal with. And sometimes, so sometimes that's what it could be. Sometimes it could be that someone needs to work through those emotions of not feeling good enough, because something that was spoken over them, and they find the wrong, like, the wrong person. So that's why they keep picking that person. And sometimes it's just having that accountability of, okay, this week, I want to exercise and maybe do a little bit of reading or get out and see people. And then the next week, having the accountability, okay, tell me what you did this week, what works well for you, because I always like to start with something what went well, because that way they can bring up what, even if it's something small, well, I went for a walk. But then the rest of the week will say they didn't go well. But at least they still know I have a success. Even though I didn't do what I said I was gonna do, I still took a step, because that's really what it's all about, I believe in life is taking that step forward. Because we're still going to fall in life, we're still going to have issues, we're still going to have traumas, exactly what you said. Nobody does not ever have traumas. But it's getting past that trauma. It's what caused that trauma, cutting that off at the root, a lot of times severing that lie that tie whatever it is, and then changing it to do well, I'm going to do this, and try to think this way. And then start walking forward. Because, you know, we've got we don't know, I don't know what the rest of my day is going to hold today. You know, what could or couldn't happen? You know, we just don't know that in life. Who would have thought, two and a half years ago, two years ago, we were gonna go through what we went through nobody. So we just have to do the best. And let someone help us if that's what we need. And having that person or coach, like, I've been coached, I've had mentors, we all need them. I don't care who it is, if you ask a coach, and you even ask someone very successful, they'll say, I still have a coach, or I still have a mentor, because we all need that accountability to someone else to help us

Monica Ramirez: 00:37:44

Yes, because we're in the process of changing and transforming ourselves with our limitations or see in ourselves. So yes, I do Totally agree. I do have mandatory I have many mentors. And I still work with some some coaches. And because it is important that people need to understand that that it is normal, that it should be a norm that the majority of the human beings actually have any kind of therapy that they chose, they choose because we all need it. And we're not talking about only adults who see it since their kids. Since they're young, and young kids in elementary, their needs, sometimes they tend to be and they're not getting the help that actually they need it. Because there's still that mentality. And that's for crazy people on the then dependencies understand that. Then if they wanted to put it in that paradigm, that crazy people are the only ones go to therapy. It was crazy. Because we all need.

Marie Perez: 00:38:50

Exactly. And really, that is the truth like children needed even that much more. You know, I wholeheartedly believe that we speak life and death over ourself, over our children, what we speak out to the atmosphere makes a difference. So if you'd speak life to your child and teach them, the things that they can't do, they're not always going to be perfect. None of us are we're never going to be perfect. But if you nurture your child, if you listen to them, you know, if you sit at a table and have dinner together, I mean, my kids are grown and I know we have grandkids, they all know they come to grandma and Papa's house, we're going to sit at the table. We're not going to watch the TV. We're going to sit at the table and eat dinner. We're going to talk and then we're going to play games, because I believe it's about the connection. And then having fun fun and laughter. I mean that's another thing in our society today that people forget to do for themselves to do in their marriage to do in their Family, growing laughter is healing to our souls. So, play games, have fun with your kids. You know, my husband and I, that's something that we do regularly is we like to play dice. We like to play cards, we teach people new games, we like to sit by a campfire and just have fun. You know, because that's what's going to help someone feel better about themselves, it releases different chemicals in our body by laughing, it's a healing property by laughing by having fun. And then, you know, I think sometimes when people see that, you can have fun, you can laugh, you know, you can be goofy, silly, and that's who you are, then you become a magnet. Because people do want that in life. They just don't know how or they weren't taught that I wasn't taught that. As a child, there were five of us, we were taught, Be quiet, be quiet, any, you know, be quiet and do this. No laugh, tell me what's going on in your life. Tell me, you know, what you're thinking how you're feeling?

Monica Ramirez: 00:41:12

Or program that the kids, they have to be encased in a genomic noise, kid to not cry boys, you know, cry, years, you know, be so dramatic, and so and so. So, and those are all programs, that maybe, no, it didn't work for them, actually, for our grandparents or our parents. And it's obviously not gonna work in 2022. Because the kids are not very different than then. And more than you honor your emotions, as well, you cannot create the shields. Because if something is triggering you, this is what I tell the majority of my clients is something is triggering you is teaching you words you have to work yourself. Right?

Marie Perez: 00:41:58

Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Because sometimes, it may not even be that person you're with, it may be something they said or did. And then you walk away and you just have this attitude. And you have to that's why you need someone to talk to and say okay, I was with this person. And they said this, and I got like this, and it doesn't even have to do with that situation, it has to do with something else that triggered something else that triggered something else. And sometimes it could be as a child, sometimes it could be something a trauma in life, you know, in your 20s. And it could be anywhere, you know, a car accident, it could be something a teacher said to you, it could be something a parent losing your parents, you know them going through divorce, that can be a trigger to where Okay, let's what is it? What what do you feel? And they were never allowed to say? Well, this is how it hurt me. Or this is what it did. And you said the the perfect thing men more so than women, women talk we like to talk and men were taught, oh, wait, you're it's a weakness? No, it's not. It's a strength. Because if you can get that out, and share and tell with another man, and be able to share your emotions and laugh or, you know, get rid of some of that, that creates a greater connection between you and your children or you and your spouse and your children. And that's something that my husband does, you know, he loves to connect with men in that way saying, This is wrong how we were taught, we need to It's okay, it's okay to say that you're upset. It's okay. If you feel like you absolutely have to cry. Or if you're mad, let's find out why you're mad. What is it?

Monica Ramirez: 00:43:49

Something that I noticed a lot. The difference between a man and a woman when in particular is that men, the majority of the men, you tell them? Why do you feel? They freak out? They don't know what to do. What do you tell? What do you think they will tell you what they're thinking? I don't know what to do feel. And the same applies for the women. You tell a woman What do you feel they will tell you? What do you think they're gonna stumble in there? Because

Marie Perez: 00:44:20

That's true. And it's pretty much the same, but it's the way their brains and our brains are wired. Right? We think with our heart because we have that nurturing their heart is really up here because that's how they're taught is to think logically think about it think how they can have the solution, even though it's still the same connection. It's just, that's what it takes to bring it out of them and still so many, you know, that's not how it's supposed to be. But I think that's where we have the breakdown in a family unit is people just don't know how to communicate Do you know the husband and wife? So if they don't communicate that, how do you expect the children communicate

Monica Ramirez: 00:45:06

Yes, because we are aware the way she was to our kids at the same time, however we communicate as an adults, or kids are observing us. And that's what they're inspired to be like us. And we don't fix our problems. Wherever, that's the world that we're creating. So we can't complain. And we don't like the world that we're living in, we're not doing something to change it. And we can change it from the outside. The only way we can change it is from the inside.

Marie Perez: 00:45:37

And I think so many people don't realize that we look with our eyes. And we see so we think it's gotta be external, but it's it is its internal, its internal, in our own souls in our own heart, like, what do I need to let go of how do I need to work through this so that I'm not, for me was the emotional eating, so I'm not suppressing it, and taking the food and eating it, you have to have that other person, you have to have that, be at a coach, be at a counselor, be whoever, someone that can help you see, so that you can bring it up and react differently, to get that healing. And it's, it's always going to be an ongoing process. I mean, it took me many, many, many years. And because I was still stumbling, and making the same mistake and fixing this part, but I'm still doing this, and I'm fixing up. So it's always going to be evolving. It's just like we said, looking in the mirror, seeing that reflection and knowing that I deserve to care about myself. And it's not in a ego way. Because you know, it's not about well, I'm better than you know, we're all it's just taking care of ourselves to say, I deserve to be happy. I deserve to have better health, I deserve to have the freedom in my mind of all of those old tapes playing to rewrite them.

Monica Ramirez: 00:47:19

That's so true. Do you work with groups or one on one?

Marie Perez: 00:47:24

Well, I haven't worked with groups for a while before COVID, I actually was doing group workshops, on helping with destress. I had a one on destress. One on self care. So that's funny that you asked that because I've been trying to get material together with a friend of mine, her and I want to start having where we do group workshops online of putting together a workshop and just inviting, you know, people like okay, you want to do a little bit of some kind of short, healthy detox of just changing some foods or reading the label, like how many people you know, have no idea when you look at a food label what to look for. So we've been literally talking about doing that again. And because she lives in a different state, and so much of it's done via zoom, you know, putting the program together and inviting so that people can come in, just to educate. So I haven't done groups for a long time. But that's the direction we're literally it just in the last couple weeks, like pulling our information together and say, You know what, we just need to start and share to help educate people and women to know that. Okay, all I have to do is make this small tweak this 1% and then do it again and do it again and do it again.

Monica Ramirez: 00:48:56

Yes, that is so true. So do you have some last words that you would like to say to our viewers?

Marie Perez: 00:49:05

I think what I'd like to say is, you know, number one, nobody's perfect. But we deserve to be at peace with ourself. And sometimes we can't do it on our own. Sometimes we need that support of a health coach of a wellness someone wellness can doesn't always have to be who wellness is your sole wellness is your thoughts, you know, that? Find that person to just talk to, you know, talk with them and see Are you a good fit? And then take that step. You know, take that step of I want to do something different so that I have the freedom and I can live at peace. And I'm always always, you know, available to chat with someone Um, to see if we're a good fit. Like I said, it doesn't have to be specifically, you know, with food a lot things do tie in to food, but there's a lot that doesn't some of it is just in our heads that we need that person to encourage us. Nobody ever said, you're worth it, you're doing a good job.

Monica Ramirez: 00:50:20

That is so so true. Man he is was really my pleasure to have you in. So talk. And I really appreciate that you listen to my invitation for self talk. And thank you for everybody for listening. And this is what's helpful for you. Please write me a review. We appreciate it very much. And Also Share It With Your Friends, it may help someone else and I will be posting the information of the word contact Marie in the description. So look for that. If you're interested to book an appointment, we're her. Just look into the description. Thank you so much. This is Monica Ramirez, Warrior of Love and thank you for being in Soul Talk.

Marie Perez: 00:51:06

Thank you.